[Jacob-list] Sensetivity

[Gary Tomas Fay]

Jacob List,

I see these posts going back and forth and I would like to take a moment
to offer two observations. I will for the moment play devils advocate so
please bear with me.

The first observation is this: We all live in this society, each of us
has been hurt and disappointed by others in our lives. Sometimes these
people are members of other groups and as we tend to do humans group
things together in categories. All it takes is a few words or actions
that are simmilar and boom we have a group we like or dislike and
possibly rasism. Let us say at one point it time that I spoke with terms
like that, and there was a group of people that I looked down upon. I am
not sure how many people are Christians on the list but please here
this. A member of this group, whom I did not view favorably was very
patient with me and eventually became a good friend and help me refind
Christ. Had he turned his back on me I would have missed an opportunity
to find Christ and find a very good friend. I benefited from another's
patience and for that I am grateful to him and to GOD.

On another note, (the second observation is this...) one does not always
know the history of the one you are dealing with in any encounter. There
is a neurological disorder called Tourette's Syndrome, please see
www.tsa-usa.org for more details. Many people hook on the "Coprolalia"
but this is a minor symptom for the whole spectrum of this disorder. It
is a neuromuscular disorder and recent research has proven that it is a
real disease with measureable diagnostic "clues." For the people who
suffer from this the disorder can prove very isolating. I will say this
is a trap that I fell into, the more isolated I became, the angrier and
more isolated I became. It took someone stepping beyond their own
desires and hurt feelings to pull me back and out of this isolation.

I ask you now,  as a Christian, is it better to isolate someone who is
different or offensive, or extend to them a welcoming hand?

Gary Fay

"Black, Tiar and Jason" wrote:

> Here I come out of the shadows again. I am not writing this to upset
> or offend anyone but I feel I need to say something also.   I was also
> raised in a family who would not think twice (or even once) about
> using those types of phrases. I was also an adopted child who was
> terrified that my adoptive parents would find out I was one of "those"
> people - like in the phrases they used. It has taken many years of
> getting over it but I have chosen to distance myself from people who
> use those phrases and to try to teach my children other ways of
> recocnizing differences in different ethinic groups. ie the beautiful
> color of some peoples skin, stature, clothing etc.... Hopefully my
> children will not use the phrases that my family (and others) use in
> their language - at least that is my goal. Maybe that is sheltering
> them but for now I feel it is important for them to make their own
> judgements and I do not need outside help in this matter. We all have
> the right to say what we like but when it offends someone this deeply
> it is also our right to walk away from further conversation with this
> person. I have enjoyed EVERYONES postings in the past and I will
> continue to read all of them as I am learning alot from you all but I
> am sorry - if this type of phrase were to be used again by the same
> individual I would choose to delete the post without reading it - this
> is my right. Thank you all for listening to my rambling.Tiar
> BlackZLazyJ FarmFriday Harbor Wa
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