[LargeFormat] Reply to Ken - read at your peril

Thu Jun 20 16:30:26 2002

Dick,

Are you in need of a studio assistant?  I don't have much experience in
greasing up Aussie models, but I do appreciate fine Scotch, and I'm a
willing and fast learner.  Please consider this my letter of application.  I
will be packing my bags in eager anticipation of your reply in the
affirmative.

Schuyler Grace

Phone:        480.693.3569
FAX:          480.693.7555
CO-MAIL:        52N-AWT

-----Original Message-----
From: Ken Hough [mailto:k4sb@niia.net]
Sent: Thursday, June 20, 2002 12:12 PM
To: largeformat@f32.net
Subject: Re: [LargeFormat] Reply to Ken - read at your peril

Good God Dick! I'm including my original question to this post lest the 
members wonder what I was thinking. here goes:

One of the problems with your postings is that I'm afraid to open 
them. 
You always have my point of view as to "how to" do something. And 
thats  great. Its what follows that keeps me on the floor laughing. I 
have to ask this: 
What the hell is a Bucket O' Frogs pose? I did an internet search for 
it.  Found a frog legs restaurant. Could they benefit from table 
dancers doing  the "Bucket O' Frogs" pose while diners eat? 
Ken 

Your Reply:
Dear Ken,

    I am sending an open reply as your server has refused my previous
letter. This shows a sense of good taste on the part of your computer, but I
shall not let that stop me. Once I have a computer keyboard and a glass of
Glenfiddich I am dangerous.

     The Bucket O' Frogs is actually a contraction of the complete phrase "
As slippery as a bucket of soapy frogs ". In the context of the nude poses
it refers to the practise of greasing the model.

    We used to use baby oil but the smell became too much - it tends to
cling to all the curtains and once you get it into a stucco wall the stain
is there forever. Ditto Crisco or olive oil. These tend to attract bugs as
well.

>>>>A nude model against a stucco wall? How mean! Or how tough the 
skin of those aussie women are!

    We have settled on a light coating of hospital grade examination
lubricant. I get it from Ramsay Surgical in a 20 litre tub and this goes a
long way, particularly if the models are ticklish. When we are done they can
be hosed off in the shower or out on the back lawn. I once made the mistake
of doing this on the front lawn verge, thinking to save water. You should
have seen the neighbor's curtains shooting open and closed! Any rate a blast
from the fine spray clears most of it and the sea lion likes to play around
in the water as well.

>>> Oh My God.....A sea lion? They bite. I know ( do not ask )

    Uncle Dick

PS: Never set a greased model up on the top of a playground slide at
McDonalds. It's just asking for disaster and a lot of these places have
gravel pathways under the slide.

PPS: No, I don't smear it on them myself. I have an assistant to do this. It
costs $ 100 a week, but that is all he can afford to pay.

>>>>>OK on the floor..............can se th kys of puter................It
hurts 
laffing.......
Ken

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        ******Ken Hough Photographic Repair******
         Specializing in Deardorff Refinishing
          Lens Recementing and Shutter repair
          Contributor to McKeowns Price Guide
                   Deardorff Section
           Custom machined Photographic items
           Text Contents Copyright 1999 KHPR
          http://deardorffcameras.0catch.com/
                   Est. 1980 

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