[AGL] forwarded to me by old friend from New York City now adivorced commercial real estate agent in Los Angeles

[Wayne Johnson]

I love these!

I love Jackie Mason!

Richard Lewis is Jewish?  I guess I didn't watch the right TV.  (I always
thought he was Korean.)    (................ka boom.)

Thanks.

yours in irish goy joy.

wgJ
  -----Original Message-----
  From: austin-ghetto-list-bounces at pairlist.net
[mailto:austin-ghetto-list-bounces at pairlist.net]On Behalf Of Michael
Eisenstadt
  Sent: Friday, December 16, 2005 11:03 AM
  To: austin-ghetto-list at pairlist.net; Marie; Guylite at aol.com; Beverly
Veltman
  Subject: [AGL] forwarded to me by old friend from New York City now
adivorced commercial real estate agent in Los Angeles


  Quotes from Quotable Jews...

  Most Texans think Hanukkah is some sort of duck call.  Richard Lewis

  My father never lived to see his dream come true of an
all-Yiddish-speaking Canada. David Steinberg

  Look at Jewish history. Unrelieved lamenting would be intolerable. So, for
every ten Jews beating their breasts, God designated one to be crazy and
amuse the breast beaters. By the time I was five I knew I was that one. Mel
Brooks

  The time is at hand when the wearing of a prayer shawl and skullcap will
not bar a man from the White House, unless, of course, the man is Jewish.
Jules Farber

  God, I know we are your chosen people, but couldn't you choose somebody
else for a change? Shalom Aleichem

  The remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served
us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. Calvin
Trillin

  My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me. Benjamin
Disraeli

  It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then
don't say it. Sam Levenson

  I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen
days I had lost exactly two weeks. Joe E. Lewis

  A spoken contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. Sam Goldwyn

  I have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something
Jackie Mason

  I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve
immortality through not dying. Woody Allen

  Too bad that all the people who know how to run this country are busy
driving taxis and cutting hair. George Burns

  Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they
deserve everything they've stolen. Mort Sahl

  I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth,
even if it costs them their jobs. Sam Goldwyn -----------------------------
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