[Austin-ghetto-list] Saudi Allies

[Wayne Johnson]

This just in:

Saudi Arabia will not permit the United States to launch military attacks
from its soil.

However, the following actions WILL be permitted:

1.	Non-Jewish and non-African American and non-Female soldiers, in orderly
groups of six or less may convene on the Eastern shore of Saudi Arabia and
make rude gestures toward Afghanistan.  . (no mooning permitted.)

2.	The U.S. Ambassador may go on Saudi TV and say:  Nyah, nyah, nyah in both
English and Arabic.  (Limited to five minutes a day.)

3.	U.S. military advisors (with the exception listed above) may wear
armbands with: "bin Laden's mother wears Gucci combat boots."

4.	No actions of any kind to be taken between sunup and sundown during
Ramadan.


The Saudi representatives said that these "radical and important" gestures
would more than compensate for the loss of military bases.  He did not
respond to questions about the Muslim cleric tonguing his left ear.

B.